Things That Bug Me.

[keithrock]

People on the motorway.

[Rid Skwerr]

English speakers who add a non-existent "r" into words e.g. what a draughtsman does - DrawRing or the girls name AmandaR

Hard to explain, but I'm getting increasingly annoyed by the way that the "main" BBC news weather person "performs" the weather report rather than just reporting it. E.g. "Watch out" for showers in the south-west rather than "there will be some" showers in....

 

Anyway - Friday's faux pas are -

 

221. The shoe has completely changed from one foot to the other.

222. It's the biggest blunder they've had round their necks.

223. I'm a fireplace footballer (Fire side)

224. Everything's getting bottled down.

225. Beetroots, onions and jerkins.

226. They keep making mountain holes out of mountains.

227. He was going like a tram.

228. I'll put my nose on the line.

229. I'd have done the same if I'd been sitting in your shoes.

230. I was just sitting there biting my head off.

231. I'm the last legs of my house.

232. We'll keep the ball ticking over.

233. They are tarred with a very bad brush.

234. The Operators have to be manned at all times.

235. The committee are doing all the running.

236. We're peaking up to a lot of troughs.

237. This sounds like crying milk.

238. Swimming is a better exercise than all these aerobatics.

239. He was torn to threads.

240. He's just going over the coals.

 

re 234 - the female operators liked that rule!

[B.C.G. JAG]

People on the motorway.

 

1. Drivers who hog the middle lane.

 

2. Drivers who gets so annoyed with other drivers hogging the middle lane that they erratically and angrily weave across all the lanes to prove their point when they really should have just stayed in the fast lane.

[spider jag]

Heard someone chattin on his fone at the bus stop - "Honestly mate, that wiz me - like a red rag tae a flame!"

[hamiltonjag]

"Ah went lit 'at."

"She went lit 'at"

"So ah goes lit 'at"

 

In everyday use but baffling to foreigners.

 

I've got a group of Swedish kids over here on a youth exchange with my mob at work. I suggested to the Scottish group that speaking slowly might be a good idea.

 

"So.........ah.......went......lit......at.....tae.....ur.....Chantelle.......you're......a.....cow.....by.....the.....way"

[Blackpool Jags]

"Ah went lit 'at."

"She went lit 'at"

"So ah goes lit 'at"

 

In everyday use but baffling to foreigners.

 

I've got a group of Swedish kids over here on a youth exchange with my mob at work. I suggested to the Scottish group that speaking slowly might be a good idea.

 

"So...........ah..........went......lit......at......tae.....ur......Chantelle........you're......a.......cow.....by.....the......way"

 

Love it. Especially when wee herries like Chantelle are involved.

[twinny]

1. Drivers who hog the middle lane.

 

2. Drivers who gets so annoyed with other drivers hogging the middle lane that they erratically and angrily weave across all the lanes to prove their point when they really should have just stayed in the fast lane.

 

I'd say I'm number two, but I think soon I'll just take to undertaking.

[B.C.G. JAG]

I'd say I'm number two, but I think soon I'll just take to undertaking.

 

People will always need burying - it's a good trade if you've the stomach for it.

[McKennan]

There was a 'trustafarian' lassie cyclist (10:1 art school student) in Sauchiehall St a few months ago who was... get this... ringing her bell for pedestrians to get out of the way... on the PAVEMENT! What a boot, I was hoping for a street urchin to put a stick in her spokes.

 

 

A few broken teeth and a busted bike should mend those ways. What ticks me off about some cyclists is the type who'll sail through a crossing when a traffic light is on red.

[Rid Skwerr]

Sunday screams -

 

241. He's driving me round the batty.

242. He has overcooked our goose.

243. Whatever shoe the fit wears,wear it.

244. We keep talking about these window

openings,but we don't know what's in the envelopes.

245. They're just trying to rush our guns.

246. Running around in blue circles.

247. Lies, lies and damned statistics.

248. Turning down a gift horse in the mouth.

249. It's like trying to get blood from water.

250. You'll have to buck up your socks.

251. You're close to the ranks.

252. Put the ball back on to the other foot.

253. Not worth the tuppence its written on.

254. He's just feathering his own canoe.

255. Running on amok.

256. We can defend that to the hilt.

257. It's like getting water out of a duck's a.....

258. He was just humming and puffing.

259. I was seeing bloody bonkers.

260. I'm not shooting you a leg.

 

 

Is it my imagination...or are they getting more bizarre?

[gianlucatoni]

A few broken teeth and a busted bike should mend those ways. What ticks me off about some cyclists is the type who'll sail through a crossing when a traffic light is on red.

 

 

 

... take a ticket and get in line ... you'll find HJ up front in that queue!

 

Some cyclists mat be confused that in certain cases at pedestrian crossings they have to dismount to cross while at others they are allowed to remain seated - ergo breaking red lights (from a car drivers perspective) is an extension of riding through a pedestrian crossing.

 

As for the Art School walloper in Sauchehall St, I think that you'll also find that it is incumbent on the city council to display a 'No Vehicles' sign at every entry point to the 'pedestrian' precinct ... that they choose not to do so and additionally allow delivery vehicles to park outside shops means that bikes are allowed and therefore people on foot should be more aware of what's going on around them as most are generally wired to the moon while ambling around in all directions.

 

I think what ticks me off is a lack of understanding of cyclists!

 

 

Light blue touch paper and stand back for round 3!

[alx]

... that they choose not to do so and additionally allow delivery vehicles to park outside shops means that bikes are allowed and therefore people on foot should be more aware of what's going on around

 

What's next, banning sheep herding on Sauchiehall St?..... the bounders!

Edited August 9, 2010 by alx

[Paulo]

Back to the weather report. Especially on GMTV.

 

Why is East Anglia so important? Every blinkin report has at least 3 references to East Anglia!!

[hamiltonjag]

It seems several people are indeed joining the anti-cyclist lobby.

 

Now the t*ries are back in power they may choose to bring back fox hunting for the yah-yah chinless retards.

 

Welllllll..... how about we suggest they leave the foxes alone and introduce cyclist-hunting.... same horses, same hounds, same blood and gore. No foxes harmed...... just those pesky cyclists that no-one loves.

 

And it would make GREAT T.V.

 

Tally ho.

[gianlucatoni]

It seems several people are indeed joining the anti-cyclist lobby.

 

Now the t*ries are back in power they may choose to bring back fox hunting for the yah-yah chinless retards.

 

Welllllll..... how about we suggest they leave the foxes alone and introduce cyclist-hunting.... same horses, same hounds, same blood and gore. No foxes harmed...... just those pesky cyclists that no-one loves.

 

And it would make GREAT T.V.

 

Tally ho.

 

 

Hamiltonjag bugs me!

 

As for the cyclist hunting will the hounds and horsey people be allowed to break red lights and ride/run on pavements ... it's just not cricket if they do!

]

Even our new Eton and Oxford educated PM does it so it must be allowed! (How many law breaks can you count?

) Edited August 9, 2010 by gianlucatoni

[Blackpool Jags]

Sunday screams -

 

 

 

Is it my imagination...or are they getting more bizarre?

 

They are getting a wee bit more bizarre. Seems like Tony retired at just the right time. Loving his offerings all the same.

[Rid Skwerr]

More Tonyisms.....

 

261. I'm just a Liberal of the road.

262. You've just got to lump it or leave it.

263. Heads will fly.

264. He's got a bone up his back.

265. Let's get this quite frank.

266. Don't lets be honest about this.

267. A clean bill of mind

268. No use going over old water again like a gramophone record.

269. We got stuff in by airport.

270. A VDU screen that swilts and tivels.

271. We're going down to talk roast turkey with them.

272. I've just called this meeting to clear the floor.

273. He just appeared over the blue.

274. Have you heard anything on the breath of the wind.

275. It could be nipped in the bud one way or the other.

276. Minuted all over the shop floor.

277. It's a red hot potato just now.

278. We're just bringing up old ground.

279. Sometimes you get one of them running together.

280. I haven't seen a scrap of pen about it.

[McKennan]

The phrase 'this lunchtime' on the news at, er, lunchtime. 'At the top of the hour' is another one that gets on my jewels. Oh, and did I mention how idiotic pundits sound when they talk about footballers 'stepping up to the plate'? God preserve us!

[G Jag]

The phrase 'this lunchtime' on the news at, er, lunchtime. 'At the top of the hour' is another one that gets on my jewels. Oh, and did I mention how idiotic pundits sound when they talk about footballers 'stepping up to the plate'? God preserve us!

 

That reminds me how much I hate the phrase "up top" increasingly used by football pundits when the actually mean "up front". Ewen Cameron is particularly guilty of this abberation.

[Rid Skwerr]

...and we complete our 3rd century of one man's torturing of the English language...

 

 

281. The problem is if you get caught in the wood.

282. You wouldn't get me on a bike for a month of Sundays.

283. The Chiltern One Hundreds.

284. He can't see the trees for the wood.

285. Infantesimal amount of errors.

286. The No 2 GCS machine was out of the air for a while.

287. I've just been banded about the printers again.

288. He's been banging my ears again.

289. He's got the bit between his mouth.

290. It folds up like a banjo.

291. Suffering the throngs of Toryism.

292. I'm just getting my Q's and I's dotted.

293. I'll be in there kicking up with both feet.

294. He came back with his legs between his tails.

295. I phoned them at 11.30 this afternoon.

296. You could drive a ship through it.

297. I thought he was near as ninepence.

298. They are a load of crap-trap.

299. They're up to the earholes.

300. If your printer goes down or something hairy the next morning.

 

 

No 283 - there used to be a pub in Argyle St. called "The Chiltern Hundreds" ----something parliamentary, I believe.

[Graemei]

Keeping with pundits...

 

When they call Steven Gerrard, "Stevie G"

 

Anything Lawro says, except when watching England get beat while he is commentating.

 

Getting extremely excited on sky sports news when something slightly intresting happens involving two team they do not support.

[twinny]

Getting extremely excited on sky sports news when something slightly intresting happens involving two team they do not support.

 

The sensationalism of the most banal stuff on the same channel. It's so funny when they build up news of something big happening and then in the end there is nothing of note to talk about - yet they can still spend hours and hours discussing it anyway.

[Rid Skwerr]

Entering the home straight.....

 

300. If your printer goes down or something hairy the next morning.

301. You'll need to guard it with a fine tooth comb.

302. He is looking at it with intrepidation.

303. He's working away till one in the morning every night.

304. There's light at the end of the rainbow.

305. We're well behind the scenes.

306. It keeps them off my hair.

307. It's like water out a duck's a-----.

308. Just hanging about like the thread thru' the eye of a needle.

309. A lot of red skin and bones flying about.

310. We're on an expanding wicket.

311. I was caught between two fires.

312. Let's not get them involved in our hair.

313. They can go and jump in their own bloody canoe.

314. He'll be keeping the fort going.

315. It would put you up the bend.

316. It's no skin off their door.

317. That's the rub that galls me.

318. Through the whole shooting bag of tricks.

319. I was the sandwich in the meat.

320. He was spot up to date.

[Blackpool Jags]

Entering the home straight.....

 

 

 

Keep 'em coming dude.

[Rid Skwerr]

Keep 'em coming dude.

To hear is to obey.....

 

321. They'll knock down the hole in the wall.

322. I'll never forgive the day.

323. One night at eight o'clock in the morning.

324. This is what happens when you give someone an eighth of an inch they take half an inch.

325. I've got some scope up my sleeve.

326. Hell forgive me.

327. You never know what's happening up your sleeve.

328. Hell bells me.

329. Once we get the thing off the air.

330. The "heid" plumber.

331. All this local derby chit-chat.

332. We're living on an ice age.

333. It's all planned moves afoot.

334. Everyone to his own cup of tea.

335. We'll all be sitting biting our thumb.

336. I was sick at them.

337. That's the nature of the game

338. (Police car with) sirens blazing and all that.

339. Partridge in a Fir tree.

340. It all set dry.